Dear Boy From Another Place,
When I met you on a stupid new dating site I had the lowest of expectations. But you said a few intriguing things during those uncomfortable first date two hours (I even laughed), so I answered your follow up texts. What the hell, it's summer.
Then a second date turned into a third and fourth and you said some other interesting things, and you shared your feelings once or twice during and after kissing. One time I met your best friend and another time you met mine.
When you held my hand during a movie and walked me home after every date I felt like a couple. After four years of me, myself, and casual sex with idiots, I got excited. I followed your lead and opened myself to you. When I missed you I said it, when I wanted to see you I said it.
When you said "I really like you" several times, I said it back as many times. Because I meant it.
When after we slept together you started to fade away because of your busy new job, I pretended to understand. Because I'm cool.
But GUESS WHAT, BOY!?
I'm not that fucking cool. No one is! I have a job too and a life, and some pretty amazing friends, and some cool hobbies that take my time like improv comedy and writing this blog, and yet somehow....SOMEHOW I find the time to think about you and press my fingers to my smartphone and type a text. AND THEN I PRESS SEND.
Technology is mind-blowing!
Boy from another place, YOU'RE BEING AN IDIOT. Stop it please and go back to your daily text messages that included what you ate for lunch, smiley-face poop emojis, and pictures of you as a child in a superman suit. Because I liked that.
BECAUSE I LIKE YOU.
YOU DOPE.
Like,
me
When I met you on a stupid new dating site I had the lowest of expectations. But you said a few intriguing things during those uncomfortable first date two hours (I even laughed), so I answered your follow up texts. What the hell, it's summer.
Then a second date turned into a third and fourth and you said some other interesting things, and you shared your feelings once or twice during and after kissing. One time I met your best friend and another time you met mine.
When you held my hand during a movie and walked me home after every date I felt like a couple. After four years of me, myself, and casual sex with idiots, I got excited. I followed your lead and opened myself to you. When I missed you I said it, when I wanted to see you I said it.
When you said "I really like you" several times, I said it back as many times. Because I meant it.
When after we slept together you started to fade away because of your busy new job, I pretended to understand. Because I'm cool.
But GUESS WHAT, BOY!?
I'm not that fucking cool. No one is! I have a job too and a life, and some pretty amazing friends, and some cool hobbies that take my time like improv comedy and writing this blog, and yet somehow....SOMEHOW I find the time to think about you and press my fingers to my smartphone and type a text. AND THEN I PRESS SEND.
Technology is mind-blowing!
Boy from another place, YOU'RE BEING AN IDIOT. Stop it please and go back to your daily text messages that included what you ate for lunch, smiley-face poop emojis, and pictures of you as a child in a superman suit. Because I liked that.
BECAUSE I LIKE YOU.
YOU DOPE.
Like,
me